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Friday, September 25, 2009

Guarding the Property

When we walk Boz in the neighborhood he causes a stir. All the local sentries come out to give him what fer and the hair on Boz's butt goes up. He's a lover, not a fighter.

I imagine if we could understand what dogs say it would be all single-syllable words and their sentences would be peppered with profanity. "You no come here! This my $%@# yard! You go! You go now! Go fast! You no come back!" They're just doing their job.

On the block behind us there's an area we call The Chihuahua Corridor. Long before he gets there Boz gets a mohawk going all the way down his back. Now Boz could kill a chihuahua with one chomp of his teeth. But with dogs, size really doesn't matter. It's all about confidence. When I stay home and John walks Boz, I know exactly when the two of them enter the Chihuahua Corridor.

This little guy may not look tough, and Boz's hair stays flat when we pass this house. But this guy's always got something to say: "This my $%@# yard! You go now! Wait! You come back here, you $(&# dog! I said come back here right now! You play?"

18 comments:

Dina said...

LOL, that's a photo of an oxymoron.
Dawgone, that's good dialog you propose, Petrea.

Shell Sherree said...

Hee hee!!! Boz doesn't swear though - does he?

Petrea said...

Hee hee, Dina, is that the breed?

Boz rarely barks at all, but he swears in his sleep.

Bellis said...

Ha ha, that's the funniest thing I've read for ages. Love the dialog - I bet that's what they're saying! Abby really gets a kick out of returning the insults, it makes her day when there's a good spat. I didn't spot the cute little doggie in the photo at first because I was looking for something large and fierce, like a rottweiler.

Laurie said...

I always imagine that the dogs have accents from the countries of their breed origin. You know, the French poodles all sound like Leslie Caron or Maurice Chevalier and the English Bulldogs like Alister Cook or Julie Andrews... you get the idea.

I'm convinced if my Molly could speak she'd sound like a Valley girl. Sigh. Poor Molly.

Margaret said...

Re: Laurie. I always think my dog would sound like Cindy Loo Who in the Grinch Who Stoele Christmas. Sweet Boz.

Petrea said...

You all should meet Bellis' Abby. She's Australian. Has a very strong accent.

So in this case, Boz would have an English accent if he ever said anything. Except he's a mixed breed and I'm not sure what the other part is besides Boxer. But I think he would like Cindy Loo Who very much.

We have an Oxymoron next door. Small dog, big bark.

Bellis said...

That reminds me of a friend of a friend who was getting a German shepherd puppy and signed up for German lessons so she could train it. And that's a true story!

Greg Sweet said...

Once there were three male dogs who set eyes on a beautiful female Poodle. They all rushed over to her. Aware of her charms, she said, "I will go out with the first one of you who can use the words 'liver' and 'cheese' together in an intelligent sentence."

Immediately the Lab said, "I like liver and cheese."

"No imagination at all", said the Poodle.

Next was the muscular Rottweiler, who blurted, "I hate liver and cheese."

"That's worse than the Lab", she replied.

Finally, a tiny Chihuahua smiled at his opponents, gave the Poodle a knowing wink, and said "Liver alone, cheese mine."

J+P said...

I just noticed a big rason this picture works (besides the comic asymmetry): the warning letters are almost the same color as the garage. That's cool.

Petrea said...

Bellis, I'm glad that was a friend of a friend so I wouldn't have to be concerned about your choices.

Greg, that might be what's upsetting Boz so much when he travels the Chihuahua Corridor.

J, I want to get a "beware of dog" sign that matches our house. You know, sandstone and marble.

altadenahiker said...

Boz didn't know he'd grow up to be such a lucky little man.

WV: Fiesto. And have fiestos all the time (if only he could stay awake).

USelaine said...

Too cute!

I was embarrassed by a pug many years ago, whose owners spoke to him in Hungarian. He understood more than I did, and I'd had weeks of language training.

Italo said...

ahahahahahahahahah

Dina said...

Well if it isn't a breed name, I guess you have made it one. LOL

But seriously, in foreign countries I try to know the dog commands in the local language just in case of unfriendly dogs off the leash.
Switzerland was tricky, with all their languages, but I did learn how to tell a dog "Go home!!" in French and German. Or to shout couchez! Platz!

Petrea said...

Hiker, sometimes people ask me if he's a she. That's why I'm glad he doesn't speak English. Although he's an excellent communicator.

Je comprends, Elaine. Milou, the terrier across the street, parles better francais than I do.

That's wise when you're traveling, Dina. And I suppose a loud "NO!" is universal.

Lori Lynn said...

Cute!
My experience is that they are guarding the Castle. In their DNA. At least that is my experience with Bostons and Staffordshires...
LL
Regards to Boz from Wilson!

Petrea said...

Royal Wilson! Regards from Boz.